I recently had an unexpected encounter in my yard with an old friend. He is someone with whom I once shared a deep, intimate and significant relationship. It had been ages since we last spoke, and though the silence of the years lay thick between us, the connection—that kind of soul-deep connection—remains unmistakable.
It was good to see him. We exchanged pleasantries. Then, as we tend to do, we got down into the deep. He posed a question that caught me off guard: "Why are you giving up on your dream?"
Yes, it is true that I am selling my "dream property". Yes, I'm selling the equipment I bought for that ice cream shop I once dreamed about opening. Yes, I'm heading to Florida to spend some time with my aging Dad even though I don't like Florida much. Yes, there is a financial component to my decision to sell. My head was swimming with so many thoughts I thought I had already sorted through.
"I simply want to be free with no obligations or responsibilities," I heard myself say to him.
I must admit, his question rattled me a bit. I heard his voice in my head asking it over and over as I went about my day. When I finally had a chance to sit quietly and explore what was up for me, I realized that his question was simply an opportunity for me to reflect on all that is happening in my life right now, none of which he is a part of anymore. He is a man who goes after what he wants. I've watched him manifest his dreams over the years we spent together. I must admit, coming from him, the question "Why are you giving up on your dream?" is one that might have unsettled me for a long time, had I not spent some time deeply engaged in what Marcia Weider, founder of Dream University, might call a "period of discernment."
You see, I haven't given up on my dream. Instead, I have allowed it to evolve as I have evolved. I am not the same person I was when I was in relationship with this man. I am not even the same person I was yesterday! None of us are.
As I approached my 65th birthday, I gave myself the profound gift of debriefing my life. I took a deliberate journey through memories, lessons, and countless shifts. This reflection has brought incredible insight and clarity and is fueling the dream that I am living today as well as the new one I am actively creating for my future. I'm grateful to myself for setting up my life in such a way that I've had this reflection time. I'm also grateful for the freedom to take simple steps and lean into what feels like the next right step for my life.
It’s vital to recognize when a dream no longer serves you. Holding on to what was can prevent us from embracing what could be. Integrity at a soul level demands that we know who we are and what is truly ours to do—and just as importantly, what is not. This discernment allows us to clear space for new dreams, making us more available to fulfill our evolving roles and visions.
The process has not been fast, nor has it been easy, but it has been important for me. Those who have supported me over the past couple of years know that the journey I've been on. They have witnessed bits and pieces of the emotional roller coaster ride I've been on. And in this process of moving through the waves of emotions and letting go of what I once desired, I have found immense and indescribable freedom. Freedom from the constraints, responsibilities and attachments of outdated aspirations, and freedom to embrace a future created by the person I am now, not who I once was. This freedom has become the cornerstone of my new dream, one that will be fueled by the financial and emotional freedom I will experience once my property is sold and I'm able to spend some quality time with my Dad, and more fully explore the spiritual landscapes of my own growth and human potential.
Perhaps the most beautiful thing for me right now is to acknowledge my old dream for the learning, the lessons and the growth it provided me. Little does my friend know how that one question has served me in the next steps towards my new life. Another benefit of letting go of the dream that no longer inspires me is to witness how letting go of my old dream is supporting someone else's new dream of opening an ice cream shop or owning a retreat center or bed and breakfast in the mountains.
Through actions that reflect my true desires and resonate with the core of my being, I am discovering the ultimate way to create and pursue new dreams. Perhaps, this is what we are all meant to do: to inspire and invite others by who we are being, and by the dreams we dare to pursue.
So, to my old friend, thank you for your visit, your question and for helping me dig a little deeper into why I'm doing what I'm doing. And to anyone wondering about the dreams I’ve let go, know this: I am not giving up. I am simply moving forward. With each step and in any given moment, I act on what’s important to my heart and my soul. For that is serving my new dream. And that is a journey worth embracing at any age.
If you are interested in hearing what Marcia Wieder has to say about dreams and discernment, you can listen to her here.
Although I've liquidated all the ice cream equipment, if your dream is to own a bed and breakfast or a retreat center, I might be able to help you make that one come true here:
https://search.suzannedamon.com/listing-detail/1125091499/1527_Village_RD-Madison-NH
It was good to see him. We exchanged pleasantries. Then, as we tend to do, we got down into the deep. He posed a question that caught me off guard: "Why are you giving up on your dream?"
Yes, it is true that I am selling my "dream property". Yes, I'm selling the equipment I bought for that ice cream shop I once dreamed about opening. Yes, I'm heading to Florida to spend some time with my aging Dad even though I don't like Florida much. Yes, there is a financial component to my decision to sell. My head was swimming with so many thoughts I thought I had already sorted through.
"I simply want to be free with no obligations or responsibilities," I heard myself say to him.
I must admit, his question rattled me a bit. I heard his voice in my head asking it over and over as I went about my day. When I finally had a chance to sit quietly and explore what was up for me, I realized that his question was simply an opportunity for me to reflect on all that is happening in my life right now, none of which he is a part of anymore. He is a man who goes after what he wants. I've watched him manifest his dreams over the years we spent together. I must admit, coming from him, the question "Why are you giving up on your dream?" is one that might have unsettled me for a long time, had I not spent some time deeply engaged in what Marcia Weider, founder of Dream University, might call a "period of discernment."
You see, I haven't given up on my dream. Instead, I have allowed it to evolve as I have evolved. I am not the same person I was when I was in relationship with this man. I am not even the same person I was yesterday! None of us are.
As I approached my 65th birthday, I gave myself the profound gift of debriefing my life. I took a deliberate journey through memories, lessons, and countless shifts. This reflection has brought incredible insight and clarity and is fueling the dream that I am living today as well as the new one I am actively creating for my future. I'm grateful to myself for setting up my life in such a way that I've had this reflection time. I'm also grateful for the freedom to take simple steps and lean into what feels like the next right step for my life.
It’s vital to recognize when a dream no longer serves you. Holding on to what was can prevent us from embracing what could be. Integrity at a soul level demands that we know who we are and what is truly ours to do—and just as importantly, what is not. This discernment allows us to clear space for new dreams, making us more available to fulfill our evolving roles and visions.
The process has not been fast, nor has it been easy, but it has been important for me. Those who have supported me over the past couple of years know that the journey I've been on. They have witnessed bits and pieces of the emotional roller coaster ride I've been on. And in this process of moving through the waves of emotions and letting go of what I once desired, I have found immense and indescribable freedom. Freedom from the constraints, responsibilities and attachments of outdated aspirations, and freedom to embrace a future created by the person I am now, not who I once was. This freedom has become the cornerstone of my new dream, one that will be fueled by the financial and emotional freedom I will experience once my property is sold and I'm able to spend some quality time with my Dad, and more fully explore the spiritual landscapes of my own growth and human potential.
Perhaps the most beautiful thing for me right now is to acknowledge my old dream for the learning, the lessons and the growth it provided me. Little does my friend know how that one question has served me in the next steps towards my new life. Another benefit of letting go of the dream that no longer inspires me is to witness how letting go of my old dream is supporting someone else's new dream of opening an ice cream shop or owning a retreat center or bed and breakfast in the mountains.
Through actions that reflect my true desires and resonate with the core of my being, I am discovering the ultimate way to create and pursue new dreams. Perhaps, this is what we are all meant to do: to inspire and invite others by who we are being, and by the dreams we dare to pursue.
So, to my old friend, thank you for your visit, your question and for helping me dig a little deeper into why I'm doing what I'm doing. And to anyone wondering about the dreams I’ve let go, know this: I am not giving up. I am simply moving forward. With each step and in any given moment, I act on what’s important to my heart and my soul. For that is serving my new dream. And that is a journey worth embracing at any age.
If you are interested in hearing what Marcia Wieder has to say about dreams and discernment, you can listen to her here.
Although I've liquidated all the ice cream equipment, if your dream is to own a bed and breakfast or a retreat center, I might be able to help you make that one come true here:
https://search.suzannedamon.com/listing-detail/1125091499/1527_Village_RD-Madison-NH
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